| Friendships sailing.. |
[Oct. 11th, 2009|02:17 am] |
| [ | Feeling |
| |  pleased | ] |
| [ | Listening to |
| | Backstreet Boys - Inconsolable | ] |
HEY YO.
My livejournal like totally dead? Ish ish ish.
Hahah, okay os quick update. HAHHA. Life's been uppppppppppppppppp & downnnnnnnn & upppppppppp & downnnnnnnnnnn & upppppppppp again. I think you all get my point lah.
But life's good when you got company like.......
KHALIESAH!
FIRDAUS!
FARA!
VICKY!
GANESH!
SHOBANA!
Hehehehe, i love these six idiots many many~ :D
Okay, byeeeeeeee. (: |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2009|11:43 pm] |
| [ | Feeling |
| |  aggravated | ] |
| [ | Listening to |
| | Linkin Park - New Divide | ] |
You seriously piss me off, you know that.
1. Did I ever fucking mention that you didn't apologise to me? I know you did, damn it.
2. I'm fucking pissed off with you not because " you didnt apologise ". I'm fucking pissed off because you easily let go of this friendship. I wonder how much I mean to you, I really wonder. If roles were reversed, I would fucking hell try my best to get you back. I wouldn't tell you to stay out of my life because my life won't be my life then.
3. Clearly, you wrote in your sms. " I'll have to earn back my parents' trust & .... " Did you ever mention trying to earn my trust back? Did you ever mention about making me belive in your words back?
4. I asked you what about him? You replied you were gonna cut off ties & I told you that I dunno whether I can believe there's any meaning to those words. & all you replied was, I don't mind. Huh? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? That you don't mind that I don't believe in you anymore? So this is how much I mean to you huh? Woah, thanks for showing me.
5. You know what. I hate to really bring this up but sad to say, history repeats itself. The only difference was the names of the best friends you lost then & now.
Hmm, i'm sick of all the bickering & fighting & crying & emotional strains. So I'm just ending this in a neutral state. Goodbye. |
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| If only you knew.. |
[Sep. 10th, 2009|02:36 am] |
| [ | Feeling |
| | aggravated | ] |
| [ | Listening to |
| | Nelly Furtado - All Good Things ( Come To An End ) | ] |
Sisterhood.
Any idea how much it means to me? Any idea until what extent I can go to keep it? Any idea how it impacts my life so much? Any idea how fucking painful is it for me to lose it? No, you don't. You don't seem to have any freaking idea at all, do you?
So easily, for you to tell me to stay out of your life, isn't it? Have it ever crossed your mind to try salvage? Have you ever thought of atleast attempting to earn my trust back? Maybe you told me to stay out of your life so that I won't have so much pain & trouble. If this is the case, then sad to say, you don't know your sister so well then.
When I called you a sister, I really meant it. You were the ideal blood sister that I always wanted. I loved you as much as I loved my very own blood sister. Or maybe even more. Everytime we fought, I always compromised or reason everything out. I would give it all my best to make sure that this friendship would stay strong & not break. But this time, you simply told me to stay out of your life. Did you have any idea how much that hurt me, goddamn it? It felt that you didn't ever care enough to try salvage this friendship? You just simply gave it up.
Is our friendship so meaningless to you that you can just let it go like that? Without even trying? Fucking hell. I tried my fucking best everytime to make sure sisterhood remains. But now, you're just telling me that all those efforts I put in is just going into fucking waste? That you can just give this up?
I'm utterly speechless but I have to move on, isn't it? If this is how you want to keep it as, then who am I to argue? Maybe you're right. Maybe we're better off without one another. We'll go along our separate ways & act like, oh nothing's happened. I'm fine, you're fine, we're all fine.
So now you all finally learn. This is what we call. Sisterhood.
Well, fuck it then.
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 20th, 2009|10:58 pm] |
| [ | Feeling |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | Listening to |
| | Sean Paul - So Fine | ] |
Examinations.
Sucky if you ask me. But somehow I enjoy having them. They keep my brains awake & there's always long holidays after them. :D 6 weeks of pure bliss. Niceeeeeeeee ~
Fasting month ahead. TIME TO LOSE WEIGHT YO! Hahahaha ~ Can't wait. Kay, dah, bye.
3 days & still going on. (:
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 17th, 2009|01:36 am] |
| [ | Feeling |
| |  blank | ] |
| [ | Listening to |
| | Bachna Ae Haseeno - Jogi Mahi | ] |
Depression.
I've never believed in myself suffering from depression. At the very worst, I'm extremely upset. But these past few days, I've been depressed. Depressed emotionally & mentally. I couldn't think straight and crying didn't help but I just did. Last night was just horrible. No sleep came to me & I lay up awake the whole night stoning or smoking or both. Not to mention, my fluctuating fever did not help one bit. :/
However, I'm now in midst of recovery. I took med just now & my fever's going down slowly but steady. & I've given up on smoking. I threw my packs & disposed my lighter. All for a better future. Special thanks to Aloy & Khoryiling, who had to put up with my stubborness & yah. I'm sorry, aites? Emotionally drained now, but slowly picking everything up. Thanks to Khaliesah & Fang for putting up with my rants & giving me such sweet words of consolation. My 3 sisters & 1 .. brother(?) uh yah. (:
Japanese tomorrow. I'm gonna mug hardcore after blogging. I have to. I need to get an A for Jap. I promised Sensei alr. Hmm, semestral exams. A good time to distract myself from problems. Okay, I'm off now. Bye.
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